seesonlysmoke: (in Sufi's arms)
Would you rather keep moving or settle down? Why or why not?

I have moved so many times in my life. The first was when my parents and sister were murdered, and I was adopted by a police officer and his wife who had recently lost their own son. When I found out that police officer had led the attack on my parents' home, I ran away. Since then my life has been on the move from a madrassa to following Hilal.

Now I am back in Kashmir, but that still doesn't mean I am not moving. We move from safehouse to safehouse because if the police find us, they will kill us.

Sometimes, I think about how nice it would be to settle down. I know it's impossible, but I still think about it. I know just how it should look because I drew the picture a long time ago. It is a red house, up in the mountains where there's snow, except for the green cricket pitch. With me is Sufi, and we would both be so happy.

I was a child when I drew that picture, and I have not been that child for a long time.
seesonlysmoke: (questioning)
Ficlet: With there being so much focus on faith this week, it seems only right to ask you to take us into this side of you muse for a glimpse of how religion touches them, if it does at all.

Religion touches every part of my life. It is the heart of life in Kashmir, and it is also a cause of the problems. I am Muslim and, as one who was born and lived in India controlled Kashmir, like many Muslims here, I would like for my country to be joined with our brothers on the other side of the Line of Control.

When I was adopted by the Khan's, I learned that while my adoptive father was a Muslim, but I was very surprised that my mother was Hindu. I really couldn't believe that a Muslim and a Hindu got married, and it made me curious. Nilu, my mother would take me to the mosque, and she would also take me with her so that she could pray to her gods at the temple. I remember those times as being happy, and I still feel fortunate that I had that chance to see that Hindus really aren't any different. Indeed, while I hate her husband, I still dearly love my ammi, Nilu.

Then, when I was eleven, everything changed. I discovered that the man I had come to call abba was the man who murdered my family. I tried to kill him, and when I couldn't I ran. That was when I was found by Hilal Kohastani, a Pathan and devout Muslim. He raised me and taught me truly about Islam and jihad, and he showed me that I could fight for Allah and free my people in Kashmir. Hilal was mujahaddeen in Afghanistan against the Soviets. They tortured him, and his survival then gives me the strength to know that I can be his missile, and Allah's weapon of destruction.

I have nothing to lose, my faith is all that I have. And if it guarantees that Khan-saab will die, then I am more than happy to do whatever Allah wills of me.
seesonlysmoke: (Default)
Decided to let Altaaf use it first. Will upload it to Danny's account in the next day or give me a break.
seesonlysmoke: (quirky smile)
The kind person who has gifted me with a paid account.

seesonlysmoke: (with Sufi)
Who are you involved with romantically? No one. There is Sufiya Parvez, or Sufi as I call her. We knew each other as children in Dalgate before 23 June that year. When I returned to Kashmir, she had her own television programme. I watched her dance, and she was beautiful. We went out on a shikara, and it could have been so good.

Is the relationship satisfying? No, it cannot be. I am a jihadist. There is no room for a relationship. It would not be wise, either.

Do you think that you make enough time for each other? Why or Why not? Because she is a TV star and I am a jihadist. But that time on the shikara, when I told her how my family's deaths still affect me, was something that I treasure.

Have past relationships ever gotten in the way of the current one? Elaborate. No, Sufi has always been the one I have wanted. The only thing that is in the way, is perhaps my relationship with my bhais and Hilal.

Do your viewpoints mainly agree or disagree? We agree that Kashmir should be free, but she believes that it can be achieved through peaceful ways. I do not. This is why we cannot be together, and why I had to use her to get my brothers access to a transmitter tower.

Do you foresee it lasting? It has not lasted. It barely begun. She does not understand why I must do this. She told me to leave when I tried to explain.

How close to your dream mate is this person? I would once liked to think that she was my dream mate. I would have liked to marry her, but it will never be.
seesonlysmoke: (window)
A list of ways you're different from the rest of your family.

1. I am alive.
seesonlysmoke: (Gun)
2. Make a list of things people assume about you.

I'm a terrorist.
I do not want peace.
I do not love Kashmir.
My only motive is religious doctrine.
My only motive is revenge.
I'm naive.
I listen to Hilal too much.
I should move on from my parent's deaths.
I should forgive Inayat Khan for murdering them.
seesonlysmoke: (Default)
Make a list of reasons why you don't celebrate the holidays.

-- I am Muslim
-- I do not celebrate infidel holidays
-- I observe those of Islam
seesonlysmoke: (Gun)
2. Make a list of obsessions.

-- To free Kashmir
-- To kill Inayat Khan

4. Make a list of hopes.

-- That one day, Inshallah, I shall know peace.
-- That one day, Kashmir will be free of Indian rule.
-- That my nightmares will stop.
-- That Sufi will forgive me for using her.
-- That I will remain a good Muslim and Allah's servant.
-- That I will make Hilal proud.
[locked]-- That Ryan will become a good friend.[/locked]
-- That I will avenge my family and kill Inayat Khan.
seesonlysmoke: (Gun)
1. Make a list of people you would take a bullet for.

-- Sufiya
-- Neelima Khan
-- Hilal
And most of all
-- Allah

2. Make a list of people you would put a bullet in.

I would sooner blow them up with one of my missiles, but

-- the Indian regime controlling Kashmir
-- enemies of Allah
and most of all
-- IG Inayat Khan
seesonlysmoke: (window)
*all messages are in Kashmiri*

Can you come to the TV studio? Sufi

We need to talk. abba

please altaaf, i want to see you. ammi

i can get away tomorrow. ammi

no. i will leave after inayat leaves. ammi

I can help you, Altaaf. abba

I miss you. Sufi

i miss you. ammi
seesonlysmoke: (masked)
(OOC: I hadn't realize just how long I've neglected this muse.)

What is your feeling about the death penalty? I believe people should pay for their crimes. As the authorities will not bring Khan-saab to justice, as he is one of them, then I shall do it myself. For my own actions, if that means my death, then I am happy to die for Allah's sake.
Do you have a strong sense of your history and that of your family? Is it important to you? All Kashmiris have a strong sense of history. After all, that is why we seek our independence from the control of India. At the same time my family will be avenged. As for my other family, I still care for Neelima. She was so kind to me when I was brought to their house. From her I could have learned tolerance as she is Hindi and she showed me her temple and that we are not all that different. Her husband on the other hand; it is important that I kill him.
Do you enjoy meeting new people are are you wary of strangers? I must be wary of them. A stranger could be the enemy, seeking a way to infiltrate my cell. It is something Hilal is very sure we are aware of.
What, if anything, do you believe is worth suffering for? Why? What I am doing now is worth the suffering. This fight for Kashmir, for Allah is worth the suffering. The hope that I will confront and kill Inayat Khan for murdering my family is worth the suffering. I think the why is obvious.
How do you overcome your fears? I do not know if I have overcome my fears. I still see the smoke, hear the gunfire from the night my parents and sister were murdered. But Hilal tells me that my fears are my strength and that in using them I will do Allah's will.
What is your weapon of choice? Missiles. *grin* Specifically RPGs.
Dissident or Diplomat? Of the two, I think dissident would be closest of the two.
Which do you think has more impact on a person’s character, genetics or environment? I do not know about which is greater of the two, as I can see them both. I am my parents' son. I am a Muslim Kashmiri. There has been war here since before I was born. I am sorry, but I cannot give a better answer.
What is your Quest? Describe it in detail. My Quest is twofold. I am sworn do all that I can to liberate Kashmir from Indian oppression in the name of Allah. I am also sworn to avenge the murders of my parents and sister and kill the IG of the Kashmir Police, Inayat Khan for leading the raid on my family's home and gunning them down. Also for the lies that he told me as he took me in and adopted me.
Are you a day person or more nocturnal in nature? I am a day person. I like the light when all I see is smoke and darkness.
Who, if anyone, do you trust implicitly? Sufi, and my adopted mother, Neelima. I also trust Hilal, who put me on the path to jihad.
Have you ever lost someone close to you? How did you cope with the loss? That would be a yes. For the second question, I cope with their loss through knowing that I will have vengeance on the man that killed them. A part from that fact, I am still trying to cope, but it is not easy when all I have to do is close my eyes and relive that night.
seesonlysmoke: (smoke)
Character Dossier: Answer as few or as many as you like in as much detail as possible. (Some of these may seem a bit redundant as they echo some earlier questions, but this is for a reason.)

Bedtime: Does he or she go to bed consistently at the same time? My bedtime varies a lot. After evening prayers, I usually settle down with the TV going and the noise of my fellow jihadists talking or arguing.
What Time? It is whenever, really. It also depends on the mission we are on.
With Whom? Unless you count the dozen or so of my comrades who are in my cell, no one.
Do they fall asleep right away? No, I sleep with difficulty.
If No What is He doing in the meantime? Reading? Watching TV? Sex? Tossing and Turning? Sometimes I'm listening to the TV, sometimes to my comrades. I just wait for sleep to take me.
How Much do they enjoy this activity I have not enjoyed sleeping since the day I found out that Khan-saab murdered my family.
Does He or She dream alot, little or never? I always dream.
Are most of his or her dreams scary, pleseant, sexual,etc? They are terrifying and brutal. In my dreams I relive my parents' and sister's murders. I see the smoke, hear the screams and cracks of bullets and bone.
Is any one dream recurrent (yes/no) Yes. That one. Only that one.
Does your character sleep peacefully throughout the night. Restlessly or very badly? I am very restless. I wake from that dream, only to fall asleep again and relive it again.
seesonlysmoke: (smoke)
One Word Prompt: Mourning

Eleven year-old Altaaf

One moment he had been so happy. Certainly, the men with the guns made him nervous, as did his parents' nervousness as they served them tea. Then there had been the firecrackers going off outside, in what must have been a celebration of the wedding. It didn't take much for Altaaf to persuade his mother to let him and his little sister go outside to join in the excitement, but his sister had turned back to take her doll with her, and he had waited. Perhaps if she had not, he wouldn't have witnessed the massacre. Perhaps if she had not, she would still be alive.

She was just coming, running up to him and smiling, when the door crashed open, trapping him behind it. And then the gunfire. When he pushed the door off him, all he could see was the smoke and hear the loud cracks the bullets as the masked men just fired into the house, not caring where their bullets fell. Altaaf screamed as he saw his sister lying in a pool of her own blood, and then his mother cut down by his bullets. He screamed as he looked at that masked man, those crazed, murderous eyes etching themselves into his mind. He screamed until a hand clamped over his mouth and the smoke obstructed death from his view.


They took him with them. They put him in a jail cell on his own until it could be decided what to do with him. He didn't know how long he sat there alone with only those terrifying images for company. Then the police officer came in, Inayat Khan, and told him that he was now his son and that he would take to his new home.


He said not a word to his new parents. The man made him nervous, but his wife was a lovely, kind woman, still mourning the loss of their own son from a terrible accident. But Altaaf did not speak. He couldn't. The horror...his own loses were too great for words. Instead he drew. And drew. And drew. Papers surrounded him, each one of the same thing. Each drawn feverishly as if putting it to paper would take it from his own head.

The masked man. The gleaming eyes.

It didn't, though. No matter how hard he tried. He couldn't get rid of the image of the man who had slaughtered his family.

Ten years later

Those images still reside in his mind. At night, every night, he relives that day, 23rd June, in Dalgate in his nightmares. Each night he sees the masked man. Now he knows who that man is, and has known for the past ten years, but now he is ready to avenge his parents and sister. The day that Inayat Khan dies at his hand, will be the day he can finally stop mourning the loss of his family, and his innocence.
seesonlysmoke: (masked) seems to know who I am.

altaaf is using a woman who loves him so much
altaaf is given love interest in the form of perky and versatile sufiya
altaaf is an orphan of war
altaaf is hardened by the scourge of harsh realities in the valley
altaaf is in the process of adjusting and warming up to his new family
altaaf is orphaned during a violent attack on his home by the state police hunting a rebel leader
altaaf is now a terrorist working for the deeply sinister hilal kohistani
altaaf is recovering from the psychic wounds of seeing his parents and young sister brutally shot before his eyes by a masked man
altaaf is usually striking at various installations thereby harassing inayat
altaaf is haunted by visions of the masked murderer who killed his family
seesonlysmoke: (missile launcher)
Do they look forward to or resent the day ahead? I look forward to the day ahead as I am awake and leave the nightmares behind. I can focus on what I must do and how best to bring Hilal's plan to destroy the Indian government in Kashmir -- and Khan-saab at the same time. I can see Sufi, even though I know I must betray her. I only hope she will understand.
Does he or she give the job honest attention and effort? I do what I must for jihad. I am an expert with missiles, and Hilal's weapon of destruction. This I do for Allah, and revenge.
Does He or She enjoy what they do? Enjoyment does not come into it. No, I don't take enjoyment in what I do.
Why? I would much prefer to have grown up with my family and married Sufi, and have children of our own. I do this for Allah, for Kashmir's freedom, and to be able to make Khan-saab pay for murdering my family.
Is he or She good at this job? Yes, I am. Hilal taught me well, my reasons give me the motivation, and I'm not afraid to die. Indeed, I welcome being a martyr.
seesonlysmoke: (Gun)
A list of last messages. (Written but not delivered on the day of the attack on the TV tower)

1. For Hilal Kohistani, Shukriya, you have taught me everything in becoming a devoted soldier of Allah. I am proud to be your missile.
2. For Sadiq-bhai, I would have cheered for you if you had run for Kashmir.
3. For Zubair-bhai, I will never understand why cameras are more important than missiles in jihad.
4. For Nilu...ammi, I'm sorry, but how can you expect me not to hate him?
5. For Sufi, I'm sorry. I love you, forever, and I hope you'll remember that what ever happens.
6. For Inayat Khan. Happy Birthday, Khan-saab. I hope you like my present.
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